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Author Topic: A touch of humor  (Read 328215 times)

LesPalenik

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #900 on: September 05, 2019, 10:53:24 am »

http://newcameranews.com/2013/12/10/three-people-injured-freak-oversaturation-accident/

Following the incident, The Society for the Prevention of Oversaturation (TSPOS) issued the following statement.

“Over saturating is a serious issue that is not getting enough attention in the mainstream media. Every day, millions of peoples’ aesthetic sensibilities are permanently damaged by the countless oversaturated, syrupy sweet photos posted online.”

“Every second, 4 children are exposed to an oversaturated photo. This has a cumulative effect on their young, developing aesthetic sensibilities, ultimately making the real, physical world look drab and unexciting in comparison. Is it any wonder that they retreat to richly saturated video games and the huetastic virtual world?”

OTOH, many innocent children are exposed daily to monochrome versions of images which looked initially perfect as captured in full color. This leads to over half of the young and over fifty population to a serious depression. And then you have another group of confused children who were exposed to intentionally blurred images.
« Last Edit: September 05, 2019, 11:43:59 am by LesPalenik »
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Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #901 on: September 05, 2019, 02:08:05 pm »

For Rob:

Rob C

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #902 on: September 05, 2019, 02:22:08 pm »

Eric Myrvaagnes

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #903 on: September 05, 2019, 06:12:01 pm »


Good one!

:-)
Yes!
In fact, this is the only thread in CC that I check in on regularly.
Thanks, Folks.
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Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #904 on: September 06, 2019, 12:45:31 pm »

And now something completely different: Cogito, ergo sum

Eric Myrvaagnes

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #905 on: September 06, 2019, 01:41:32 pm »

And now something completely different: Cogito, ergo sum
;D
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Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #906 on: September 06, 2019, 05:43:30 pm »

Another one on the same subject:

LesPalenik

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #907 on: September 06, 2019, 06:14:03 pm »

Another one on the same subject:
Punctuation and grammar are important. Simplifying it to: "I think I'm single" wouldn't be the same.
 
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Jeremy Roussak

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #908 on: September 11, 2019, 07:09:32 pm »

An Irishman, a Mexican and a blond guy were doing construction  work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. Eating lunch one day, the Irishman said “Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch I’m going to  jump off this building.” The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, “Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I’m going to jump off, too.” The blond opened his lunch and said, “Bologna again! If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I’m jumping as well.”

The next day the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage and jumped to his death. The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito and jumped too. The blond guy opened his lunch, saw bologna and jumped to his death as well.

At the funeral the Irishman’s wife was weeping. She said, “If I’d known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!” The Mexican’s wife also wept and said, “I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn’t realize he hated burritos so much.”

Everyone turned and stared at the blond’s wife. “Hey, don’t look at me,” she said, “He made his own lunch.”
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Jeremy Roussak

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #909 on: September 11, 2019, 07:11:22 pm »

And now something completely different: Cogito, ergo sum

The version I heard was similar: Descartes walks into a bar. The barman says "would you like a drink". Descartes says "Hmm. I think not." and disappears.

But it loses the opportunity for a pun, so I suppose it's inferior.

Jeremy
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Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #910 on: September 12, 2019, 12:01:15 pm »

Who says that artist statements have to be convoluted and full or art-speak? Mine is very concise:

Rob C

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #911 on: September 12, 2019, 12:54:27 pm »

This one should not be here because it's real, but I can't think of a better spot.

I was watching the arrival of late dictator Robert Mugabe's coffin back in Rhodesia Zimbabwe from the hospital in Singapore where he died (I wonder how many fellow citizens could find the money to follow that trip?) on the news the other day. To my surprise and mixed feelings of mirth on what's meant to be a sombre state moment, as the coffin was being carried by the uniformed guard of honour, the appeared, large as life, on the end of said box, an enormous arrow indicating this side up.

All that display of real or faux honour and dignity, and at the end of it, nothing but a box of product.

Oy vey, as I like to remark for some reason quite beyond me.

Eric Myrvaagnes

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #912 on: September 12, 2019, 02:25:32 pm »

Who says that artist statements have to be convoluted and full or art-speak? Mine is very concise:
OK. Let me try to date this artist. Joined LuLa in 2005 and says his age is 62. Was that 62 in 2005 or 62 now? Gee! It's really hard to pin down.    :o

 ;D
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petermfiore

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #913 on: September 12, 2019, 04:57:23 pm »

OK. Let me try to date this artist. Joined LuLa in 2005 and says his age is 62. Was that 62 in 2005 or 62 now? Gee! It's really hard to pin down.    :o

 ;D

very GooD!

Peter

Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #914 on: September 15, 2019, 10:03:39 am »

How about them apples?

Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #915 on: September 15, 2019, 10:31:44 am »

And while we are on biblical themes:

Jeremy Roussak

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #916 on: September 24, 2019, 02:59:16 am »

I was reminded of the following joke by this thread:

A couple are walking across a field when they notice a rather large bull not too far away from them. They call out to a farmer, leaning on the fence: "Excuse me, is this bull safe?"

"Oh yes, he's safe. Safe as houses."

<reflective pause>

"Can't say the same about you, though."

Jeremy
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Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #917 on: September 28, 2019, 04:01:41 pm »

If anyone needs my services, PM me, please.

Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #918 on: October 01, 2019, 11:37:24 am »

On euphemisms:

LesPalenik

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #919 on: October 03, 2019, 01:34:46 am »

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