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Author Topic: A touch of humor  (Read 229676 times)

RSL

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #960 on: December 16, 2019, 09:34:17 am »

 :D :D ;D ;D A good one, Peter.
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Eric Myrvaagnes

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #961 on: December 16, 2019, 03:50:19 pm »

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Rob C

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #962 on: December 16, 2019, 04:16:32 pm »

+2

Robert Roaldi

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #963 on: December 17, 2019, 05:44:04 pm »

A Glaswegian walks into his local library and asks the librarian if they have any books on suicide. She answers, "Aye, we do."

The follow asks, "Can I borrow one?" and she says, "No." He asks in a huff, "Why not?" and she replies, "You'll no bring it back."
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Rob C

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #964 on: December 18, 2019, 03:29:06 am »

Good one!

drmike

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #965 on: December 18, 2019, 03:30:13 am »

And the Scots delivery seems to suit the joke so well. 'You won't bring it back' doesn't have the same feel.
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Eric Myrvaagnes

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #966 on: December 18, 2019, 06:00:36 am »

And the Scots delivery seems to suit the joke so well. 'You won't bring it back' doesn't have the same feel.
+1.
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PeterAit

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #967 on: December 20, 2019, 08:16:43 am »

The young novice goes to the Mother Superior to complain about the rough language being used by the construction workers at the site next to the convent.

"Well," replied the Mother Superior, "construction workers will call a spade a spade."

"I wouldn't mind that, but they call it a goddamn motherf*cking shovel."
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Peter

"Nothing spoils fun like finding out it builds character." -- Calvin (and Hobbes)

LesPalenik

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #968 on: December 21, 2019, 10:45:14 am »


1st woman:    Hi! Wanda.

2nd woman:   Hi! Sylvia.  How'd you die?

1st woman:    I froze to death.

2nd woman:   How horrible!

1st woman:    It wasn't so bad.... After I quit  shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?

2nd woman:   I died of a  massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act.  But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

1st woman:    So, what happened?

2nd woman:   I was so sure there was another woman  there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement.  Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds.  I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

1st woman:   Too bad you didn't look in the freezer---we'd both still be alive.


Rob C

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #969 on: December 21, 2019, 10:59:39 am »

Excellent!

:-)

petermfiore

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #970 on: December 21, 2019, 04:18:45 pm »

I liked it as well...

Peter

KLaban

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #971 on: December 25, 2019, 10:14:31 am »

Warning, the following clip could be unsuitable for those with a particularly sensitive disposition or reindeer lovers in general.

For the rest, well enjoy.

Reindeer Reality
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Rob C

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #972 on: December 25, 2019, 10:24:34 am »

Warning, the following clip could be unsuitable for those with a particularly sensitive disposition or reindeer lovers in general.

For the rest, well enjoy.

Reindeer Reality


I know a guy who sounds exactly like that! I blame the beer and two lousy marriages, poor guy.

:-)

Eric Myrvaagnes

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #973 on: December 25, 2019, 10:51:57 am »

It's good to hear that the #Reindeer Too movement is alive and well!
Thanks for that, Keith.
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Jeremy Roussak

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #974 on: January 12, 2020, 12:12:34 pm »

.

Jeremy
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Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #975 on: January 12, 2020, 02:07:44 pm »

Along the lines:

Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #976 on: January 12, 2020, 02:13:27 pm »

Furthermore...

Jeremy Roussak

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #977 on: January 12, 2020, 03:24:27 pm »

Art?

Jeremy
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RSL

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #978 on: January 12, 2020, 03:43:46 pm »

 ;D ;D ;D 8)
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PeterAit

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #979 on: January 19, 2020, 11:42:10 am »

My apologies if this is a re-run.

The young seminary student is invited to have tea with the Mother Superior at the convent across town. It's a lovely day so he decides to walk. His route takes him thru some of the seedier parts of town.

Soon a young woman in short-shorts and a halter top comes up to him and asks "How about a quickie for ten bucks?" He has no idea what she is talking about so mumbles something and walks on.

Soon another similarly dressed woman comes up and asks the same question: "Ten bucks for a quicky?" He hurriedly walks on.

He gets to the convent and has an enjoyable tea with the Mother Superior. As he's about to leave, his curiosity gets the better of him. "Mother Superior, what's a quicky?"

"Ten bucks, same as in town."
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Peter

"Nothing spoils fun like finding out it builds character." -- Calvin (and Hobbes)
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