Phase-detect focusing requires a fast aperture not because it needs lots of light, but because essentially it is measuring parallax. There has to be enough of a geometric difference in the light paths from a point to the sensors in order to work. This is true for both DSLRs and mirroless cameras, there is no fundamental difference here.
The d850 focuses slower (not worse, if anything, better) in live view because it uses contrast-detect focusing. The Z7 uses a combination of both phase and contract-detect.
The amount of light per unit area is the same for DSLR and mirroless for a given f-stop, so there's no difference there either. Also the sensors can be amplified just as much.
In principle, contrast detect could work in dimmer EV levels (and smaller apertures) compared to phase-detect at the expense of speed, not sure in practice if that is true or not (probably not).