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Author Topic: A touch of humor  (Read 235313 times)

Jeremy Roussak

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1300 on: July 09, 2020, 07:03:20 am »

Too true.

Jeremy
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Eric Myrvaagnes

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1301 on: July 10, 2020, 06:59:00 pm »

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PeterAit

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1302 on: July 13, 2020, 04:54:16 pm »

An ant and elephant meet and fall in love. They spend the evening making love. In the morning, the ant wakes up to find that the elephant is dead. "Shit," says the ant, "I finally meet someone and now I have to spend the rest of my life digging a grave."
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Peter

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LesPalenik

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1303 on: July 13, 2020, 05:10:24 pm »

I presume the elephant was a male.
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Slobodan Blagojevic

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1304 on: July 27, 2020, 12:39:14 pm »

...

degrub

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1305 on: July 27, 2020, 04:00:50 pm »

a little red light humour, eh ? ;) ;D
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PeterAit

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1306 on: July 27, 2020, 05:48:24 pm »

An ant and an elephant fall in love and get married. On their wedding night they spend hours making love and then fall asleep. Ok waking, the ant discovers that the elephant has died.

"Shit," says the ant, "Now I have to spend the rest of my life digging a grave."
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Peter

"You are entitled to your own opinion but not your own facts" -- D.P. Moynihan

LesPalenik

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1307 on: July 27, 2020, 05:59:41 pm »

It's hard to take a joke like that every 2 weeks.
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kers

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1308 on: July 28, 2020, 06:52:13 am »

It's hard to take a joke like that every 2 weeks.
Especially when you are an ant.
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LesPalenik

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1309 on: July 28, 2020, 07:46:11 am »

The elephant would be also upset dying twice in 2 weeks.
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PeterAit

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1310 on: July 29, 2020, 06:33:57 pm »

OK, let me try again.

President Calvin Coolidge and Mrs. Coolidge were making a presidential visit to a farm. While viewing the chicken pens, Mrs. Coolidge asked the farmer "How many times a day does the rooster copulate?" The farmer replied "Many times a day." Mrs. Coolidge said "Please tell that to the president."

Later the president came by the pens and was told about the rooster. He asked the farmer "With the same hen every time?" The farmer replied "Oh no, a different hen each time." The president said "Please tell that to Mrs. Coolidge."
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Peter

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Chris Kern

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1311 on: July 29, 2020, 09:43:20 pm »

President Calvin Coolidge and Mrs. Coolidge . . .

Apropos of which, President Coolidge was well-known for his taciturn New England demeanor.  He was a man of few words.  In the press, and in political circles in Washington, Coolidge was known as "Silent Cal."  It is said that when The New Yorker writer Dorothy Parker was told of his death in 1933, she turned to her interlocutor and inquired, "how can they tell?"

PeterAit

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1312 on: August 02, 2020, 05:09:41 pm »

Apropos of which, President Coolidge was well-known for his taciturn New England demeanor.  He was a man of few words.  In the press, and in political circles in Washington, Coolidge was known as "Silent Cal."  It is said that when The New Yorker writer Dorothy Parker was told of his death in 1933, she turned to her interlocutor and inquired, "how can they tell?"

I have no idea why this joke was about Coolidge, but that's how I heard it.
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Peter

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Robert Roaldi

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1313 on: August 04, 2020, 01:06:21 pm »

I have no idea why this joke was about Coolidge, but that's how I heard it.

Isn't it referred to as the Coolidge Effect? Used to be a Wiki page about it.
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Robert Roaldi

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1314 on: August 04, 2020, 01:07:22 pm »

They've released another updated version of the Vote Him Away "cover" [link deleted]. Good singing too.

[moderator: That is an overtly political video and while it might amuse those of certain political persuasions, it isn't "humour". Or even humor. Keep politics to political threads.]
« Last Edit: August 04, 2020, 02:14:44 pm by Jeremy Roussak »
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Robert

PeterAit

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1315 on: August 14, 2020, 06:13:41 pm »

They've released another updated version of the Vote Him Away "cover" [link deleted]. Good singing too.

[moderator: That is an overtly political video and while it might amuse those of certain political persuasions, it isn't "humour". Or even humor. Keep politics to political threads.]

It would have been more appropriate to delete RR's post and let him know by PM why. But making this public--while not allowing anyone to view the video--seems to have no point while seemingly having put the brakes on this humor thread. Let's hope the thread kicks back into gear!
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Peter

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Robert Roaldi

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1316 on: August 14, 2020, 09:48:21 pm »

It would have been more appropriate to delete RR's post and let him know by PM why. But making this public--while not allowing anyone to view the video--seems to have no point while seemingly having put the brakes on this humor thread. Let's hope the thread kicks back into gear!

This is my first time back to this thread so i didn't know about the deleted link until now. I thought the song was funny and I assumed it was ok to make fun of politics and politicians. Professional comedians do it all the time. But no problem, if this is not wanted I won't do it again.
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Redcrown

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1317 on: August 15, 2020, 11:17:54 am »

An old guy is sitting an a park bench when some youths come skateboarding by. One has spiked and waxed hair, dyed in red, yellow, green, and blue, plus tattoos and piercings. The old man stares him down as he makes repeated passes on the skateboard.

Finally, the kid stops and says, "What you looking at, old man. You never do anything wild when you were young." The old guy pauses for a second then says, "Yeah, I got drunk once and screwed a peacock. So I'm wondering if maybe you are my son."
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PeterAit

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1318 on: August 21, 2020, 04:21:57 pm »

A handsome young man and a lovely woman who had never met before,
but who were both married, found themselves mistakenly assigned to the same sleeping
room on a trans-continental train. Though  initially embarrassed and uneasy over
sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper berth and she in the  lower.

At 1:00 AM, the man leaned  down and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you,
but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket?  I'm awfully cold."

"I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married."

"Wow!  That's a great idea!", he exclaimed.

"'Good", she replied. "Get your own fucking blanket."

After a moment of silence, he farted.
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Peter

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Peter McLennan

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Re: A touch of humor
« Reply #1319 on: August 21, 2020, 09:15:29 pm »

A handsome young man and a lovely woman ...

HA!  Excellent!
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