Can you try hardware-setting your TV to what you need for the videos to look good, and then use a profiler like Spyder, EyeOne, etc. to set an ICC software-only monitor profile that will look good for the photos since it appears that the Blu-Ray players ignore ICC profiles? I don't know if this would actually work, I have given up trying to look at photos seriously on the HTPC since the darks look so washed out when the TV is set up for pleasing video playbac
That is sort of what I tried to do, but the display needs to be set far to brightly (very hot) to be manageable with a normal ICC profile. It's like the Blu-Ray software assumes everyone wants their display to look like it is in demo mode at the store.