I am not familiar with Lightroom 3, so I can't make comparisons to that software, but I do use ACR in Photoshop CS4. I have a fast computer (Intel i5-2500K / DZ68BC) and I, too, see some lag in Lightroom 4. However, the lag is not significantly different than the lag in ACR. Once you have a couple of adjustment bush edits or added gradiant masks, you are making the CPU work very hard. A low or middle performance computer is going to suffer.
Not knowing Lightroom 3, I can't be sure, but I suspect what you are seeing is the impact of the ACR features that have been merged into Lightroom 4. Adobe may be able to modify the software to reduce the delay you are seeing, but more likely you are going to need a faster computer to work comforatably with Lightroom 4. A graphics card may be an option, but I have not tried this and I am not sure if the delay is being caused in a graphics process or a CPU process. My hunch is that it is the latter.