Is it delusion? Can we create a word for ourselves that matches the expectation, the hopes?
I think that this word is clew: expectation
Strictly talking from my experience, and trying to avoid falling in abstract philosophy, the concept of expectation is the problem.
Precisely because there is expectation, there is no possibility of acheivement.
When there is expectation, is that something is expected.
The problem is that there is a confusion between the acheivement of the expectation, the goal, and the way to reach that goal.
The goal is nothing exiting. When you get it, it is just disappointing, unsubstantial. And then you need another one because this one is just borring.
What really is exiting, is the path.
Think of a montain climber. What do you feel when you reached a summit? In this precise moment? You just stays there a few minutes because you have to go down quickly. People did not understand very well why Amstrong and Aldrin where not excited when they walked on the moon (please no hoax debate).
Simply because what is exiting is the path. Once you're there there is nothing, just boring but another chalenge.
Have you ever felt some kind of short depression when you finally acheived a difficult project? You've been working on it like crazy during many time, you put all your energy and expectations in it. Suddenly, you did it, it's done. What do you feel? Depressing instant. Nothing interesting any more there. Nada.
Suddenly you feel completly empty. The sense of your efforts has just collapsed on these seconds.
The path is the goal, and the goal is the path.
So, what is exiting is the shooting, not the result. Not the 2 pages editorial in Vogue that has been acheived, but just the shooting.