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Author Topic: Amazon.com's message to me  (Read 3210 times)

ckimmerle

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Amazon.com's message to me
« on: March 20, 2010, 06:41:26 pm »

First email I opened this morning was from Amazon.com, which recommended a Photography for Dummies book. Their bot must have looked through my website and thought I needed help. Between this, and all of the Viagra emails, I'm beginning to think the Internet is starting to learn <sigh>
« Last Edit: March 20, 2010, 06:42:33 pm by ckimmerle »
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Joe Behar

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Amazon.com's message to me
« Reply #1 on: March 20, 2010, 07:32:05 pm »

Quote from: ckimmerle
First email I opened this morning was from Amazon.com, which recommended a Photography for Dummies book. Their bot must have looked through my website and thought I needed help. Between this, and all of the Viagra emails, I'm beginning to think the Internet is starting to learn <sigh>

Don't order any Viagra till you talk to me...I can get up to 80% off the regular price  

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Jeremy Roussak

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« Reply #2 on: March 20, 2010, 07:48:06 pm »

Quote from: Joe Behar
Don't order any Viagra till you talk to me...I can get up to 80% off the regular price  
And I could supply any number of dummies for you.

Jeremy
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tim wolcott

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Amazon.com's message to me
« Reply #3 on: March 20, 2010, 08:38:21 pm »

You don't have to look to far.  The look at our government.  When in doubt they will perform mediocrity at best.  T
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David Sutton

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« Reply #4 on: March 20, 2010, 08:55:31 pm »

Quote from: kikashi
And I could supply any number of dummies for you.

Jeremy

Hey Jeremy. I can get 80% off genuine Swiss watches for your dummies!
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daws

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« Reply #5 on: March 20, 2010, 09:34:11 pm »

Quote from: ckimmerle
Between this, and all of the Viagra emails, I'm beginning to think the Internet is starting to learn
Forget all the techno-mythology, the truth is that the Internet was invented by this person:














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ckimmerle

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Amazon.com's message to me
« Reply #6 on: March 20, 2010, 10:01:06 pm »

Quote from: daws
Forget all the techno-mythology, the truth is that the Internet was invented by this person:

Good ol' Dr. Ruth. Now that woman had balls....in the figurative sense.
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bill t.

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Amazon.com's message to me
« Reply #7 on: March 20, 2010, 11:24:46 pm »

Take heart, at least you haven't been identified as being FAT or having YELLOW TEETH.
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Rob C

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« Reply #8 on: March 21, 2010, 05:26:11 am »

Quote from: bill t.
Take heart, at least you haven't been identified as being FAT or having YELLOW TEETH.





No, no, no, Bill.

The secret of success lies in having both excess avoirdupois and lead chromate-influenced teeth. Combined, these elevate you into the highest level of target market index, thus raising your desireabilty to the world.

Rob C

RSL

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Amazon.com's message to me
« Reply #9 on: March 21, 2010, 08:44:05 am »

Quote from: bill t.
Take heart, at least you haven't been identified as being FAT or having YELLOW TEETH.

Bill, No sweat."You'll wonder where the yellow went when you brush your teeth with Pepsodent."
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Justan

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Amazon.com's message to me
« Reply #10 on: March 21, 2010, 12:04:55 pm »

If anyone feels that they aren’t getting enough targeted marketing, I can redirect the rejects from one of the junk mail filters I manage and will direct about 300,000 items to your inbox. Per day.

Jeremy Roussak

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« Reply #11 on: March 21, 2010, 02:08:13 pm »

I read this a while ago. It seems relevant to this thread, somehow.

Jeremy


Amazon.com is getting a little too clever.  I received an e-mail message promoting the “Encyclopedia of Digital Government”, based on my past activity.

At the bottom of the message, under “More to Explore”, Amazon suggested:

- Lies at the Altar: The Truth About Great Marriages
- Giving The Love That Heals
- Couples Companion: Meditations & Exercises for Getting the Love You Want: A Workbook for Couples

It was kind enough not to come right out and say, “We've noticed that customers who purchase 1,600 page encyclopedias on e-government also have partners who say they need some work on relationship skills.”
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Chris_T

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Amazon.com's message to me
« Reply #12 on: March 22, 2010, 08:11:03 am »

Quote from: ckimmerle
First email I opened this morning was from Amazon.com, which recommended a Photography for Dummies book. Their bot must have looked through my website and thought I needed help. Between this, and all of the Viagra emails, I'm beginning to think the Internet is starting to learn <sigh>

You have misinterpreted the message, or can profit from it. I can think of a couple of reasons:

- You have ordered from Amazon every photography product and every Photoshop book they carry, and missed this one. They value your business and want to make sure that your collections are complete.

- Someone referred you to Amazon and got rewarded by them. To return the favor and to profit similarly, send them the real names of the LL members.
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