Naugas are nocturnal, hairless, aquatic mammals of many colors that live in the Naugatuck River, and can be made to come to the surface at night by shining a flashlight into the water. The Naugas are then captured and sorted by color to be made into the various colors of Naugahyde. Allegedly, when rolled together on a mechanical press, the seams between the Naugas disappear, resulting in a seamless, leather-like product. It is common knowledge that it takes seven and a half Naugas to make a standard sized couch.
I sent the discussion onto a friend of mine well-versed in naugas, and here's her reply:
Well, your friend on this photo board doesn't have all the
facts, as is so common with those liberal environmentalists with which
you fraternize. Yes, it does take multiple naugas to make a sofa, but
the meat is nutritionally dense, though relatively low in fat and very
adaptable to most recipes that call for poultry. And contrary to your
friend's assertions regarding their hairlessness, naugas do in fact
have hair, a very fine and downy substance that can be woven on a
common loom to create a lightweight, yet waterproof fabric with a
texture similar to silk, which accepts both natural and chemical dyes
In the not-so-distant future, I see certain clever meat-packers and
textile artisans becoming quite wealthy raising these creatures. They
are rather gentle, despite their impressive incisors (which may appeal
to jewelry makers, though that market has not yet been explored), and
they can thrive on a limited diet of kudzu and other invasive plants.
I have even heard reports from researchers in Louisiana that certain of
their organs may be compatible with those of homo sapiens, so as you
can imagine, naugas have captured the interest of certain scientists
studying the fields of organ transplants and cloning.
In fact, if I ever do decide to make the break from travel publishing,
I am almost certain to pursue nauga ranching as my next career. The
future looks bright indeed.
Yours in industry, Lori
I did let her know that Texas A&M is studying crossing naugas with feral pigs in hopes of finding a new, improved solution to an old problem. ..